From time to time I have shared some of the strange e-mails I receive. But the one I got last night, telling me that I am going to be dead in a couple of days, is a real winner. Here it is, cut and pasted into this blog:
I was thinking for a long time whether it’s worth writing this letter to you and decided that you have the right to know and advise you to take this seriously if you value own your life since this isn’t a joke or a scam. I’ll try to be as short as possible. I’ve got an order to kill you, because your activity causes trouble to some people. I have been studying you for a very time and decided to give you a second chance, despite specifics of my work, the rules of which don’t allow me that, as this will damage my ten year old reputation in some circles. So i decided to break a rule since this is my final order, at least i do hope so.
Ok, lets make this short now. I want you to pay the amount of 3200 usd. I only accept Bitcoin. Details how to forward this type of currency you will be able to google. Here are my payment info: 15SGZxBc8j5etG9Q457Kef2GAaedotkCkT
When i receive money – I will tell the name of the man order came from, plus all other information. You can use this evidence with your local enforcement authorities. I do not recommend you to call the police or make any other mistakes before that, you have a very little time and they will simply not have enough time to investigate this matter. You have only two days to make up your mind.
Note that replying to this email doesn’t make any sense, because i use one-time mailbox, i do care about my anonymity and i’ll contact you when i will receivefunds myself. I really do regret that you became my target.
I knew I wasn’t going to live forever, but I really had hoped to hang around at least a little bit longer. Will any of you miss me?
This couldn’t come at a more inopportune time for me, because I also received word yesterday that a nice man from Nigeria is depositing $50 million into my bank account this week. Now I’ll never live to spend it. My timing has always sucked.
I’m not really worried. I’ve been shot by professionals, and this guy doesn’t sound like a pro. I mean, what’s with all the typos and forgetting to capitalize words that need it? I’m a New York Times bestselling author. Don’t I at least deserve an assassin that can send a decently written demand note if he’s going to shake me down? Where’s the respect?
This is just one of many scam emails and phone calls that people get everyday all around the world. Why do these clowns keep sending crap like this out? Because there are fools who believe them. Just yesterday a friend of mine was telling me that a neighbor came to her door trembling and asked if she could take her to the bank, because she had just received a phone call from the IRS telling her that a deputy was coming to arrest her and she would be locked up for a year if she didn’t wire $1200 to them within an hour. My friend was able to talk her out of it, but you can bet that right now somebody somewhere is falling for one of these rip offs.
Maybe this letter is karma coming back to bite me in the butt. A couple of years ago I got a phone call from someone telling me that they were holding my son at gunpoint, and if I didn’t send them some money right then they were going to shoot him. I told them to go ahead and do it, because I never really liked him anyway. Afterward, I did call my son and apologized, but explained that money was pretty tight at the moment. To his credit, Travis understood, and told me he would do the same thing if he was in my place.
Here is a link warning about the very same email scam I received, almost word for word. Whatever happened to originality?
The good news is, even though I may not be around much longer, Big Lake Burning is now available in audiobook format at this link. This is the first audiobook done by my new narrator, Frank Clem. There will be more to follow.
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Thought For The Day – Only the mediocre are always at their best.